Was it worth it?

    There is nothing more that I can be greatful for then for every day I walk on this earth. But is it worth it? I have asked myself this question many time. Was this fair? No it wasn't fair but it happen anyways. What did I do wrong to deserve this broke heart? What did I do? The answer is simple nothing. This just gose to show how cruel the world is. A broken bond that created and growing for years only to be shattered in mere seconds. Why? Why indeed?

    I was 14 years old when I started dating for the first time. Yeah I know that is yound but there were other started dating at a younger age then me. Anyways brian was the son of one my mother's ex friend and we known each for a few years. So the thing is how we got together because if I am being honest I was interested in dating at the time. Brian and I were close as you may tell from chating, horsing around, to playing video games. Again how we got together was a persuasion from my mother and his father because like I said I was interest in dating at the time. You are probably wondering how did they persuaded you two to date each other well here is your answer they told us to kiss. Yep the mind set of a mother and a father persuasion to get the kids to date each other. We were getting along together or at least I thought we since we were so open with each other after we known each other for a while but I was wrong. We started dating after our parents persuaded us to kiss no more then 2 months or less in our relationship I walk in to my mother's bedroom on him and my sister kissing each other. To imagine being 14 years old and in a relationship that was a result of a parents persuasion for it to not only last for 2 months or less but end because of your older sibling. Imagine walking into you parent bedroom and your partner is laying under neath your sibling as your sibling straddles your partner kissing them so deeply on your parents bed. They both other new that was the first time I dated anyone. Now let's time skip to a new relationship.

    Then 10 years later to a recent relationship with someone who I known since middle school. Yes someone who I have build a deeper and longer connection with then the first. A friendship that lasted even after high school yes a long lasting connection. We were the best of friends and so close. Even though we were physical in each other's present after graduation from high school we kept in contact. We talk for hours about our like, dislikes and weird topics that might had popped into our heads at the time. We would laugh and joke around. Then I finaly gave in and said yes to him. We were talking about building a gaming room for us. We were talking about marriage since we were so close and open with each other. Now let me explain to youwhen I found out that he changed his number, moved states away, he was dating someone else I was livit. Why you may ask is I told him I was scared to date anyone because of what happen in my previous relationship with my sister which is why it took 10 years for me to open up again to love. He wasn't going to ever break up with me.

    I the thought I found something with Daunte because the long friendship. A 12 years friendship but I should have been more guarded with my heart regardless of the deep connection we made. Instead I was led on by sweet words and empty promise, talking about marriage promise to treat me like queen no wanting to worship me like a goddess only to disappear without a word. A 12 years friendship to a 6 month relationship then disappeared.